Newlyn to Penzance 1400 metre sea swim.

Los Tres Amigos, decided to enter their first swimming competition....well that's not entirely true, it transpires that Golden Balls (a.k.a. Justin Easton) is actually a full fledged international having represented Kenya as a nipper.

The water was cold, the nerves high and unlike journeying up and down the old municipal pool, 1400 metres looks a real long way when you look over it in its entirety.

All manners and niceties end as you enter the water, after that kicking, punching and rumours of eye gouging become common place.


Visibility under water meant that you couldn't see your hand, this didn't matter as my goggles were so steamed up that, I thought I was swimming next to a seal until its white foot kicked me square in the gob.

I was spent just reaching the start line, I attempted to start with the horn but found that I just got beaten up, so I lost 20 seconds just waiting for everyone else to move.
The sewage outlet half way along, spurred most of us on to the Penzance slip way and finish line, where as one tried to get to ones feet, cramp hit instantaneously. The removal of my goggles at the slip allowed me to realise a few key things. 1) There were quite a few people behind me...hooray. 2) Golden Balls was already on the railings chatting my bird up. 3) Andy McCreedy (a.k.a The Jock) and his bright pink swimming hat were nowhere to be seen. Placing me in the silver spot in los tres amigos.

Bilbo, the now infamous  dog and his proud owner also swam....respect.

There are worse places to swim but with leaky goggles I could have been in Somalia.

Talking of Somalia, nice boat.

It turns out that Golden Balls had opted for the quick start option and then didn't want to swim behind anyone and after vomiting a bit, came home in 34th place out of 480 odd with a time of just over 19 minutes, not bad for someone who hadn't done any training at all. I of course has a conscientious lifeguard have been swimming nigh on every day and pulled in at just a smidgen under 24 minutes. Whilst the Jock who despite being fit as a fiddle, but more of a land lubber type romped home in a most respectable 25 minute time.

Gloating Golden Balls, something else he's very good at with no effort.

Bet he'd need a few more minutes to get 17 stone of prime beef over the line.

Job's a good'un.

 Training for next years Newlyn to Penzance swim begins d'rectly and the first new comer to the Spinalsurfer competition is Greg Martin of Wavelength.....anyone else?